Moment to moment. 

So reflective and grateful one moment and then the next I’m like, what is happening here? Miss Mercy is fitting right in with all of our activities and melts everybody’s heart instantly. We are figuring her out more and visa versa. She doesn’t run off when we are out and that’s a blessing. The boys are so awesome with her. We are taking everything day by day with her case and just pouring into her in the meantime. 

But you know what, parenting is hard and when there’s a lot it’s really hard. I’d never ever trade my life because I love it but it’s not for the faint of heart. And having such a big family I need Jesus more than ever. I’m very easily at the end of myself these days. Today we had a such an awesome day but it was tiring. We got home after a lot of soccer and fun but then, as any pastors wife on a Sat night knows, it’s off to the office, church, etc for the hubs. So here I am, everyone is tired, sweaty, hungry (including me). 4 sons all crazy and Miss M just following along with it all. Suddenly I’m like where am I? Who am I? Why do you have NO shoes? Who’s sock is this? You pooped in the shower? Who put silly putty on this comforter? Who peed all over the toilet? Why is there purple crayon on the white cabinets? Who’s wet towel? Who’s smelly soccer gear? Who’s fill in the blank with: water is dumped over, took all these books out, dumped this toy box out, left the iPad on the floor, clean laundry thrown everywhere, not eaten dinner, trash on the ground, ball is this, homework paper is here, etc… sometimes they all talk to me at the same time- each of them saying Mom/Mama before they say any words and I just shoot out answers or point at them for their turn. When I started this post 2/5 kids were actually crying. 

Life is so weird because I’m so concerned with soaking up my life and treasuring it but in next moment I just want to have a moment where I’m alone and nobody is talking to me. Where I can clean without someone uncleaning. I can put away paper and actually write on my calendar so I can keep my plates spinning. So I can just remember who I am. So I’m going to need to find a plan for this. Between normal life, 4 school pick ups, birth mom visits, social worker appointments, medical visits, laundry, dishes, shopping, cooking, cleaning, homework, stories, sports, church, school, etc I’m not figuring it out yet. I know I will, but I hope it’s sooner than later. 

Thanks for letting me share my heart and for a moment realize I’m just a human who loves a lot but can’t be perfect. Moment to moment I need more Jesus and less of me. I’m just human and we know humans can do great things but we can mess it all up as quick as my kids can trash their bedroom after I just cleaned it.  Or as quick as Miss Mercy can clear her bookcase of every book. I love you all. I truly  treasure your support and prayers. 


#recoveringperfectionist

Miss Mercy

Mi vida loca. I’m not gonna lie, I had some overwhelming moments today. Taking in a person that you don’t know and can’t tell you anything is rough. What do you like to eat? How do you like to eat it? Do you like milk? Do you like milk in a bottle? In a sippy cup? With a straw? In a cup? At night do I rock you? Do I just lay you down? Do I wait until you fall asleep? Do you still like to sleep with special blanket? Have you ever eaten a quesadilla? Are you allergic to peanuts? What’s your favorite song? Who are you missing from home? What was life like for you? Why are you so scared of brushing your teeth? Did something happen or have you just never brushed? What’s your favorite TV show? How you like to get your hair done? What time do you take a nap? Do you take naps? Do you have a nickname? When is your actual birthday? Do you like carrots? Nope, wait yes if they are sliced. Broccoli? No, but lettuce yes…

So many questions but we are just figuring it out a little at a time. I mean we’ve only know each other for 5 days.  I had a quick cry break. Sometimes I wonder what we are doing, then I look at Miss Mercy with her contagious smile and cackle laugh. That reminds me why. She is doing better here everyday and loves everyone. I said “I you” tonight for the 2nd time at bedtime. She blew kisses (after many rehearsals) at Elliott tonight.  Lots of learning, waiting, praying and powerless to any answers of our future together. Watching the sunset and my monkeys outside till dad got home gave me a little refreshment and perspective on how blessed I am. The Lord has shown this little one mercy by taking her out of a harmful situation and has shown us mercy by blessing us with her. She has s sweet spirit and playful personality. 

Thanks for all the prayers, gifts, hand me downs, and encouragement. I need it all 💕 These moments of reflection were brought to you by my amazing husband who is doing the dishes after working all day to provide for us. 


#momoffourboys #fostermom ❤️ #fiveisalot #yepwerecrazy #yesihavemyhandsfull #myheartistoo #love #foster #sacrifice #chosen

Day 1… 10/6/16

 Well, day one is done. Everyone is sleeping and we are about to now. After not sleeping last night we are REALLY praying that she sleeps all night. It’s been an exciting day full of ups and dips. We are all learning her personality, favorites, strength, struggles and it’s going to take awhile. She is having SO much fun with the boys.  It’s going to especially take some time building my bond with her since her mother has her issues. She’s been through so much in her life. Thank you for all the texts, comments, clothes etc. You guys don’t even know how it helps us (me) stay strong. It’s a way different ball of wax than a baby with pluses and minuses. Pray for peace and what’s best for this baby to happen quick. 

Starting again…

So tomorrow we will be starting our foster journey again! We will be taking into our home a 22 month old baby girl. We are excited to begin this new journey and asking for prayer! If you are local we would love any clothes 18 months to 2T. Ah! Here we go again! About to get on the roller coaster! Nervous but excited about what God will do this time. Had such a great experience with our first placement and we are expecting God to do something new this time as well! Thanks for walking down this path with us in love, support, and prayers.